Saturday, July 9, 2011

Summer Tradischions

Face it - Summer HATES professional sports. Basketball is done. Football is indefinitely missing. All we are left with is the Women's World Cup and the middle of baseball season. Not the most exciting time in an avid sports fan's life. But hey, summer has it's positive side too. Barbecues, lakes, vacations, and so much more. So for the sake of saving my readers from boredom, I've decided to incorporate the monotonous subject of sports with the exciting pastimes of summer. Dig in!

Neighborhood cookouts, national lockouts

Who doesn't like to hang out in the backyard with friends and family, grilling burgers, hot dogs, and the owners of the NFL and NBA for taking away our favorite games. "They're so greedy! Why can't they just agree to terms so we have something to do on Sundays?!" Well, fans, whether I have an answer for you or not, the case is: we will not have football or basketball for some time. There are several stories on different websites claiming progress is being made, but the fact is, we are well over 100 days into the NFL lockout and they've been "making progress" since Day 1. The NBA lockout is just getting underway and its already been projected to carry over into next year's season.

So, if you find yourself thinking that the NFL and NBA are certainly having seasons next year, consider this: You have a better chance of getting fatal food poisoning from that questionably dark red inside of your hamburger than seeing Tom Brady or Chris Paul on ESPN anytime soon. That's right, just throw it away.

Vacation Overseas!

Ideally, most of us like to take a summer trip out the the Caribbean. But there are those who prefer historic sites, like Rome, or Paris, or, if you're Deron Williams, Turkey! It's a beautiful land with subpar basketball (relatively), but what else can he do? He's locked out of the NBA, so he might as well stay active and improve his game while experiencing an entirely different and exciting culture. Good move, Deron.

Yao Ming has a different itinerary. It reportedly involves retirement and returning to his native home in the Far East. We are all thrown off by reports of his decision to retire, but I can't say I was shocked. The guy played just five games last season, averaging a little over 10 points and five boards. Yao is holding a press conference July 20 to announce his plans for the future, but most are expecting him to announce his retirement from the NBA.

Summer Blockbusters

Movie producers save their best work for the summer. Everyone was anticipating the release of "The Hangover II" and "Thor". Whether they were disappointments or not is up to the reader's discretion, but there is absolutely no denying the exceeding of the expectations by Derek Jeter. On July 9th, in front of his home fans, Jeter went 5-5. The sold out crowd came to watch Jeter attempt to join the 3,000 hit club, and they were not disappointed. In his second at-bat, Jeter cranked out a home run for the 3,000th hit of his career. And he wasn't even done. Later on, the future Hall of Famer knocked in the game-winning run to lift the Yankees past the Rays in an epic fashion.

The Zoo Closes on Rainy Days

Tiger Woods is going through some tough times, financially, medically, and athletically. He's announced he will not participate in the British Open and has not set a timetable for his return to golf.

Speaking of Vacation...

The Ohio State football team has vacated all of its wins from the 2010 season. Recruits are changing commitments, Jim Tressel is gone, and the future of Ohio State football is as bright as the bottom of your local lake.

And that's about it for this fine summer. Look out for the U.S. Women's soccer team, who has a chance to do some damage in this year's World Cup in Germany. Other than that, I guess we all just wait for something crazy exciting to happen...until then...go jump in a lake.


Arnolds Office furniture said...

Great article! I have always bee a sports fan that I turned my office cubicle into a sports themed cubicle.

Anonymous said...

"and the future of Ohio State football is as bright as the bottom of your local lake."

funny. :]